Bark Hot Dogs

Brooklyn, NY
www.barkhotdogs.com



The Order: Bark Cheeseburger, medium rare. Organic Angus beef, short rib and top round, pork jowl, bark sauce, b&b pickles, lettuce and onion.
Side Order: Fries ($3)
$6.25 + $3 = $9.25
Drink Order: 12oz Bark Red Ale (made by Sixpoint)
Burger Menu Rating: 12.5/15




You thought I was going full-blown Vegan?! No burgers, my lovelies, I will never abandon you. It was just an April Fools joke I swear. No, I didn't eat any vegetables behind your back. No I'll never do it again.

On a side note, in doing more reviews with the new rating system, I've noticed a flaw that I must rectify. Somehow, I gave the Plating category 4 points, when it really should have 3, and the Design/Ingredients category 3 when it should have 4. So I'm switching them. It'll allow more room for the burger itself to shine. Hope you like it. Previous reviews will not be edited. We (I) only look forward here at Burger Menu.



I know you're thinking 'but wait, this is a hot dog place,' and you're right to be hesitant, but this is a good burger! Not exactly cooked perfectly, they usually cook the burger medium well because of the pork in the meat, but they cooked it between medium rare and medium for me, so not bad. A simple burger but with great ingredients. The flavor of the meat is perfect in tandem with the sauce and the meat flavor still shines through. This is almost a fast food burger because of its size and taste, so it competes with the likes of Shake Shack in the Fast/Casual category (as it was put to me last night), in which it definitely holds it's own. I scarfed this thing down in a second, and I wasn't even starving.

The fries are perfect and well worth the three dollars. A good amount of fries, perfectly seasoned, these are thin crunchy AND soft fries. Cooked just the right amount to get that dichotomy of texture that fries need to have.

Bark does a $10 lunch deal which includes a burger, fries and a soda. They also do a dinner deal for $11 which includes a burger, fries and a draught beer. Not bad deals at all. Bark is definitely worth the price. They have a frequent eater card, aka the Bark Executive Card, which will get you rewards, like... eat 10 burgers get your 11th free (or something similar). They also sell growlers and will do growler refills of what they have on tap!




Cooked Correctly: 4.5/5
Design/Ingredients: 3/4
Plating: 2/3
Value: 3/3



Announcing! The first Burger Menu giveaway. I just bought a groupon for Prime Burger, recipient of the James Beard Award for "America's Classic Restaurants" and recipient of AOL City's Best "Top 10 Burgers". Up to 3 people can accompany me, which means I'm covering the tab! If you come with me, you get a burger, an order of fries, and a shake. FOR FREE! So. Who's coming with me? Well what I really need is more exposure for the blog. So! The first three people to email me proof that they've shared the blog with at least 5 people (hopefully these are new people), will get to come with me on this burger adventure (unfortunately, if you live outside of NYC, you're SOL, but perhaps another giveaway will be in YOUR city). All you have to do is email the link to this blog ( http://burgermenu.blogspot.com ) and cc me on the email ( theburgermenu@gmail.com ) and you're gold! Points to whoever writes the best writeup. Go!

A Major Switch

Hey there everyone. Since the beginning of the year, I've been doing pretty well with the reviews. I've only missed 2 consecutive weeks, I've reviewed more burgers than I did in the same period last year, and the reviews have been getting more sophisticated as my knowledge about everything burger grows. But this is all changing. I'm not going to be reviewing burgers anymore. In fact, I'm never going to eat a burger again. As delicious as they are, burgers are killing me, and you shouldn't really be eating them either. I didn't make this decision lightly, but after reading this article, I had no choice but to change my ways.

Studies now say that eating burgers is the equivalent of eating yourself into an early grave. It increases your risk of early death by 13%. That's 13% PER hamburger. By that math, I have a 3757% of an early death. Seriously?! I'm definitely going to die young. Do I want that? No. What if I want to have kids?! The article I linked to above mentions the health benefits of going Vegan. While I think that's a little drastic for me, at least to start out, I'm going cold turkey on red meat, and sticking to poulty and fish, and hopefully within 6 months can be completely vegetarian, then within 9 months be completely Vegan.

Wish me luck. I'll continue posting reviews on here, of veggie burgers, chicken burgers, etc. Until I go full-on Vegan, at which point this will be done.

District Commons

Washington, D.C.
www.districtcommonsdc.com/district.html



The Order: District Commons Burger. BBQ Braised Pineland Farms Shortribs, Sweet & Spicy Slaw, AP sauce (All Purpose sauce, which is mayo, ketchup, mustard, bbq and chipotle sauce)
Side Order: Comes with fries and Malt Vinegar Aioli
$16
Drink Order: Anderson Valley Brewing Boont Amber Ale
Burger Menu Rating: 8/15




Restaurant week in January cost $35.12 at District Commons for an appetizer, entree and a dessert. SO I was like 'sweet deal!' and my friends were like 'sweet deal!' so we rounded up the troops and headed over for dinner. This was one of the first times I was joined by a group of people, rather than just one or two, so I feel the need to name them all. So thank you Matt, Brian, Katie, and Becky! Yeah, I know, I've been sitting on this review for a long time, but hey. At least it's going up here now.

I just want to give a small mention to the appetizer and the dessert before I dive into describing this burger. The Pan-Seared Salmon Cake with Fresh Dill & Creole Mustard Sauce was pretty tasty. By 'cake' they really mean just like.. a salmon puck on the plate, but that being said, the salmon was flaky and moist, with the dill perfectly complimenting both the sauce and the flavor of the salmon. The Butterscotch Sundae (Vanilla ice cream with roasted peanuts and Chantilly cream, otherwise known as whipped cream) was amazing. I mean, I'd come back here to have that again in a second. Big butterscotch flavor, mixing with the vanilla ice cream and a thick chocolate drizzle. Fantastic.

Now the burger. Eh. It was pretty good, but the meat was a little burnt/charred, which definitely detracted from the overall taste. They took perfectly good short rib, pulled it all apart, and then cooked it again. Why? I have no idea, but it was totally unnecessary. What you ended up with was an overcooked burnt burger patty that easily could've been more juicy and delicious. The meat had too much seasoning as well, which, while tasty, I mean, come on, these used to be braised short ribs. They are supposed to be both packed will awesome flavor AND tender and juicy. There wasn't much taste to the slaw and the AP sauce. The slaw was supposed to be spicy?! It was only barely sweet, with a little bit of tang. I didn't even taste the tiny amount of AP sauce, which is used in their sister burger venue next door, Burger Tap & Shake, as well. It didn't add much, if anything, in the way of flavor. The bun was soft, and not too dry (a welcome respite from the meat). It would've been fantastic on a burger with more juices, or more sauce.

The fries were pretty great. Easy to eat on their own, without sauce. But then with the Malt Vinegar Aioli, they become this entirely other delicious beast of a side dish and are impossible to stop easting. Everyone at the table couldn't keep their grubby little paws out of my fries and aioli, and alas, they disappeared all too quickly.

Overall? I mean, it was easy to eat, and didn't taste bad, but the burger was entirely disappointing, especially having been talked up, and owing to the reputation of the sister burger eatery next door, of which I've heard a lot of good things, and with which District Commons shares a chef and a kitchen, but this burger was not worth the money at all. Skip this 'fancy' burger and go next door for their $6 Six Buck Chuck, which is supposed to be fantastic.




No choice in how it was cooked: -1
Cooked correctly: 3
Design: 2.5
Plating: 2.5
Value: 1

Hamilton Tavern

Baltimore, MD
hamiltontavern.com


Photo courtesy of Hamilton Tavern.

The Order: Crosstown Burger, medium rare. Roseda Farms beef, shredded iceberg lettuce, onion, horseradish cheddar. Add Sticky-Spicy Bacon and fried egg ($2).
Side order: Comes with chips. Substitute Natty Boh beer battered O's ($1). Fried dill pickle chips with Zippy Goat Cheese Sauce ($5).
$11 + $2 + $1 + $5 = $19
Drink Order: Firestone Union Jack IPA
Burger Menu Rating: 12.5/15




Hamilton Tavern is a little bit out of the way if you're in downtown Baltimore, but believe me, it's worth the trip. Located out in Hamilton, this little bar/restaurant is warm, friendly and inviting, and the burger is to die for. But let me take this from the beginning.

Hamilton Tavern has a large airy room, friendly staff, and games (located in the back corner). It's not too loud, even later in the week, though I imagine that with all the hard surfaces in this place that when it gets busy the decibels can run up. They have a decent beer menu, which gets better after 10pm. Why? Because of reverse Happy Hour. From 10pm til they close, select draughts are $3, and they have $2 Abita. Awesome. They're kitchen closes at 11pm on Thursday, Friday and Saturday, so if you get there right at 10pm, you're golden.

Joined by fellow burger enthusiast, Becky, we began with an order of Pickle Chips. Now. I'm a skeptic when it comes to pickle chips, because every time I order them, they're always made with butter pickles, and they really just don't do it for me. But these were DILL Pickle Chips. Fingers crossed. And they were delicious, as was the Zippy Goat Cheese Sauce! BUT you only get six of them. They're thick, to be sure, but definitely not worth almost $1 per chip. I'd order them again if they were $3/$4.

The Natty Boh beer battered O's were a major letdown. Crunchy, yes, but flavorless. They just tasted like oil, not even seasoned with salt. Luckily, we kept the sauce from the Pickle Chips which, once dipped in it, made the O's better. Still, I'd say they're not worth it. Save the dollar and go for the house made potato chips.

So you're thinking, wow, this place already seems like kind of a let down. Let me stop you right there. Only the O's were a letdown. The Pickle Chips were delicious, just pricy. But now we're past those and onto the main event: the Crosstown Burger. This burger was fantastic. It was cooked perfectly, and it was stacked and huge, definitely not a small burger. My mouth is watering just thinking about this thing again. I had never eaten a sweet tasting burger before this, but the Sticky-Spicy bacon works really well with the ground beef, and the egg oozing all over the place. Brown Sugar and Cayenne Broiled Bacon is a revelation. I've since made it at home, and it's super easy to do so why isn't everyone doing it yet?!

It definitely was a messy burger, so if you go, prepare to get your hands dirty as you dig into this awesome monster burger. And don't skimp on the extras. The bacon and egg really did take it to another level. All of the flavors in this burger were well balanced, all fighting for top billing, but none of them really getting ahead of the others. I did wish, however, that I could taste the cheese more. It added some great gooey texture, but being horseradish cheddar, I expected a stronger flavor to be present. The bread contained the burger well, and helped mop up the yolk and burger juices that had gushed out all over the place, and what they don't tell you is that the onions are, in fact, caramelized, and that the burger patty sits on top of them. Amazing.

This place is absolutely worth the small trek to the Hamilton area, and I'll hopefully be making it over there again soon. Fingers crossed.




Cooked Correctly = 5pts
Presentation/Plating = 2pts
Design/Ingredients = 3pts
Value = 2.5

Bar Frites

Greenvale, NY
www.barfrites.com



The Order: Asian Salmon Burgers, medium rare. Hand cut, with arugula, wasabi aioli on a brioche bun.
Side Order: Comes with fries.
$15
Drink Order: Brooklyn Brown Ale
Burger Menu Rating: 7.5/10




Set off to the side of Wheatley Plaza, this relatively large establishment is airy, and bright, but every time I've been, its been relatively empty. Perhaps it's because its location doesn't lend itself to a lot of upscale clientele (being in a strip mall and all), or perhaps it's because the prices aren't exactly low. Whatever the case may be, I'd say this place is worth going to. With the variety of foods, you're sure to find something you like. I, of course, ordered the sliders (the burgers didn't sound as interesting).

First off, the wasabi aioli is fantastic. Just enough spicyness to it so it doesn't shoot up your nose, but also creamy, and perfect compliment to the salmon. Why? Because it doesn't cover up the taste of the salmon. In fact, it has married it, and they're in a working relationship, with kids maybe on the way. The salmon was perfectly cooked. Medium rare, not dried out, a little flaky, and with a full and delicious taste. There wasn't a lot of arugula to speak of. This, I think, was both good and bad. It served merely as a textural element, but I think having more on it would have made its flavor stand out more so it could be crisp and refreshing taste when combined with the salmon and wasabi.

The fries were simple, lightly salted. They were thin cut. Normal. BUT they have truffle fries, which I think I'll try next time. They're probably going to be worth it (check back for an update). For the price, 3 delicious 2.5oz sliders and fries are definitely worth it.




Sliders Cooked To Order! = +1
Presentation/Plating = 2pts
Design/Ingredients = 2pts
Value = 2.5pts

5 Napkin Burger

Manhattan, NY
www.5napkinburger.com


Photo courtesy of the web, originally from 5 Napkin Burger.

The Order: Original 5 Napkin Burger, medium rare. 10oz custom ground beef, caramelized onions, gruyere, rosemary aioli, on a soft white roll.
Side Order: Comes with fries.
$14.95
Drink Order: 5 Napkin Nut Brown Lager
Burger Menu Rating: 11/15




This is a hip little place. Old Edison lamps hang from meat hooks all over this dimly lit bar/restaurant (too dim, in fact, to get a decent pixture w/ my crap phone), while a wide range of music plays, though not so loud you can't talk to your servers or friends. The atmosphere is relaxed, and there's a constant buzz of conversation. And this place gets busy, so I'd definitely make a reservation if you can. I walked in and was able to snag a seat at the bar. The bartender was knowledgeable about the menu, and decisive with her advice, which amounted to 'go for the original.'

This burger is about toppings, taste and mouthfeel. Everything on this burger comes together in a sot and creamy mess that is a delight to bite into. It's all soft around the meat, making he meat stand out and exist as an altogether different texture that is satisfying to sink your teeth into. And the taste of the sauce packs a big punch. In fact, it's almost too much. The rosemary aioli is so strong that you barely get any of the other flavors in the burger, and the meat flavor itself struggles to make its presence known to your mouth. The gruyere and the caramelized onions are likewise thrust aside in the aioli's quest to dominate your taste buds. Still, the burger is cooked perfectly, and the texture of the burger is perfect. Eating a bite of the meat separately from the rest of the burger reveals it to be slightly smoky, and completely delicious, so it's not as if the ingredients aren't all there and holding up their end of the bargain. This also isn't to say that the aioli isn't delicious! It is! Entirely! It's superb! But there was way too much of it on this burger.

The fries are dull and uninteresting unless smothered in ketchup; their taste not only completely lost compared to the aioli, but somehow lacking from the beginning. Perhaps a lack of seasoning, or crunch. It seems like everything about the fries, besides their presentation, is disappointing.

Still, I find myself scarfing down the burger, and fries, in my usual manner, which tells me the burger is, in fact, delicious. It's just a balance in flavor that this meal is lacking.




Cooked Correctly = 5pts
Presentation/Plating = 2pts
Design/Ingredients = 2pts
Value = 2

Pop Burger

Manhattan, NY
www.popburger.com



The Order: Pop Burgers (2), medium rare. American cheese, lettuce, tomato, and special sauce.
Side Order: Tater Tots ($4.25)
$8.25 + $4.25 = $12.50
Drink Order: Water
Burger Menu Rating: 6/10




Pop Burger, you are confusing. I have now been to two of your locations. One of you is also a bar/lounge with table service. The other is a pub with lots of wood paneling. I have not to been to your third location, but I have no idea what to expect. If I had known you were all so different, I would not have expected any kind of consistency between your locations, but alas, I was uninformed. But more on this later. This review is for the Chelsea location.

First of all, woah. You can order your sliders medium rare. Most places don't even let you try for fear that they'll get it wrong, or they just don't want to try to cook it to order because its so difficult to do. But at Pop Burger you can! You have balls Pop. You have balls. Service was relatively fast, and the behind the counter service was pleasant. I've never been in here when its very busy, or I should say, its never been really busy when I've been here during either the lunch or dinner hour. Every time, however, the sliders have come out fairly quickly.

What was really nice about these sliders is that they weren't incredibly salty, like a lot of sliders I've eaten. It was great change, and a welcome one. The special sauce on the burger is really tasty, and a little bit tangy with each bite. The meat taste doesn't really come through on the burger all that much; these are thin patties. And hey! They cooked it almost perfectly! Still, a thicker patty would've been welcome. Like last week's burger, the stacking order was a little strange, with lettuce on the bottom, BUT there wasn't too much lettuce, so it wasn't terrible. Noticeable, but not as much of a detriment. I didn't taste the cheese at all, so it seemed kind of a waste, but I loved the bun. Soft, lightly toasted; a good vehicle for these sliders.

I've had both the fries and the tots. Both of them are normal, and lightly salted. I've never had the tots overcooked, though, so I'd say go for the tots as you're more likely to enjoy them (if you like tots, and let's be honest, who doesn't like tots).

As far as presentation goes, they have it all together. Nothing special, cardboard with the Pop logo all over it, etc. but when my order came up - and this may have been a fluke - the tater tots were artfully tipped over and spilled partly out of the cup. Well done preparer. Whether you did that by accident, or on purpose, it made my tray look all the more appetizing, as if the tots just couldn't wait to escape into my mouth.

'Now, Pop Burger. You have three locations. Why are the Pop Burgers at each location different prices? Wait, the fries and tots are different prices as well? Next you'll be telling me that the onion rings and the pop corn are also different prices at your varying locations. What? They are?! This is ridiculous!'

Most of the other menu items that are the same across the three locations are the same price. For best value for the aforementioned foodstuffs, go to their "Pop Pub" location on University Place, just south of Union Square. They're Pop Burgers, fries, tots and onion rings are the cheapest, the burgers coming in at $7.75 (vs. uptown's $9.25 - the burgers are made the same).




Sliders Cooked To Order! = +1
Presentation/Plating = 2pts
Design/Ingredients = 2pts
Value = 1pts